Imagine being a gnome in the UK. Sure you look good, with the hat, the beard, the strong ceramic thousand yard stare, hell, in attraction terms you're the envy of all garden pottery, but, well it's a long winter isn't it. The cold sets in, the wind rushes through your dungarees, the rain drips off your nose and fishing rod, the un-mown grass starts to tickle at your nose, and the only way anyone will scratch away the itch is when the local stray labrador starts lapping at it with his stubbly tongue, and that's not to mention what happens if it snows.
No, I'm much happier being a human in the winter, despite our numerous flaws and glass feelings.
Plus, when was the last time you saw a gnome in a nightclub, the dancefloor is just a sea of shattering hazards and drunken people, no matter how well intentioned, just can't be trusted with figurines.
Another good night then last night, some nice patches of difference from the last and some great moments of 'dance like you mean it' fists in the air, head tipped back, singing to the rood, plus Jammie won on the bandit, ding ding.
Cheers to you all for coming down again and giving it your all, and not letting the pesky rain put you off, and don't let it put you off partying this weekend either, there's so much fun to be had and you may as well have it while you're young, free and beautiful.
Have a dance off at the bus stop.
x
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